Someone could easily impale themselves and die on those loosely scattered tiny shards on the floor. Mya slowly turns her gaze away from the floor. She is benumbed and just a meter away from it. She rests her eyes on him without giving away any emotions. It is hard to tell whether he is getting angrier or pacified from her listless twisted face. She wishes that those shards laid closer to him. Continue reading “Short Story Time: Broken Mirror”→
What do you think of the possibility of us trying to be friends? Is that pushing it a bit? Ok, how about if we just get to know each a bit better, maybe start from the beginning?
It has been almost three years now since we began our official relationship. We were thrown into the deep end, with no prior experience to draw from. Yes, you were an existing mother and I an existing daughter, but we were suddenly expected to construct a new motherly-daughterly-bound-by-law relationship. This relationship was unfamiliar, ambiguous even. There was no contract to sign, no consent sought, or consideration given. The relationship was imposed upon us. Me, I was reluctantly participating in the relationship. The thing is, reluctance often leads to resentment and resistance. That is where I was at. Perhaps you were too. Continue reading “Diaries of a British-Nepalese Bride: Dear Mother-in-law”→
2,707 miles separate now and later. Or it could be 2,808 miles. Whatever route I take, I will be leaving. Gone in 3 weeks. That’s 20 days, 480 hours until the next chapter, the next adventure, waiting for me like an excited and anxious dog at the end of a workday. At the end of September, I will leave Oakland, my home for the last 6 years. Moving across the country to South Carolina to an unfamiliar territory, to an undiscovered community. Continue reading “The Space Between Here and There”→
On a cold February afternoon, I looked out the window of my airplane and a sort of nervous calm took over me. I was on a flight from North Carolina to California. It had been raining all day and my tan loafers were soaked from walking around in the rain all afternoon in Raleigh. I had spent the day with my sister exploring the city while we waited for our late afternoon flight. We would run inside stores seeking shelter from the winter rain. My toes were starting to wrinkle inside my cold wet shoes. I was excited but the kind that is filled with anxiousness and uncertainty. I kept thinking what’s my next step and planning, eventually, I decided to stop planning and enjoy that exact moment which I knew I would never be able to experience again. Continue reading “Taking Risks”→
June was Pride month, a month to celebrate our LGBTQ community. In the US, pride month was started in 1969 after the Stonewall riots. Cities around the country, as well as the world, celebrate Pride Day. In Nepal, the first official pride parade happened in 2010, but smaller parades had existed before then. It was organized by the Blue Diamond Society, Nepal’s first LGBTQ organization. The Blue Diamond society had to go through many hurdles before they were officially recognized. I am so thankful for their work in helping create LGBTQ friendly policies and being a safe place for people in Nepal. Continue reading “Celebrating our LGBTQ Nepali Community”→
After inadvertently saying “I’m sorry” for the third time to a former coworker, he stopped me and exclaimed “Why are you apologizing to me? This was not your fault.” This question took me by surprise. I hadn’t realized I was apologizing to this man. Somehow “I’m sorry” had become a staple in my vocabulary and I tended to use it often without a second thought. I was a little flustered and immediately tried apologizing to which he laughed and said: “you don’t need to apologize for apologizing”. Yep, I tried to apologize for apologizing. Continue reading “Sorry Not Sorry”→
Shame is a common feeling that a South Asian woman like me experiences over and over throughout our lifetime. Since my birth, this emotion has held on to me like a light scar that never fades. I’ve shaken it off a few times like a wet dog, but somehow it creeps back into my life. I’ve dealt with a fair share of shame in my 31 years and those memories still haunt how I behave today. For me, the first experiences of shame that I remember started when I moved to America at the age of 7.Continue reading “I Don’t Live There”→